


I hurt you

by rantarous



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: A fix-it oneshot for the 23rd chap of 100 Years Quest, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Happy Nalu Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Natsu Needs a Hug, Nightmares, Romance, Things get intense half way though I promise, This would never happen in canon obviously but here we are
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2020-10-24 17:30:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20709845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rantarous/pseuds/rantarous
Summary: "I was the one who stepped forward Natsu," Lucy said. "I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt me.""But Lucy," Natsu held her tighter. The more he tried to express himself, the more he struggled to expel the words out of his lips. "It wasme."





	I hurt you

-x-

Lucy's body throbbed so damn much she could curl up in a ball and let herself rot right there and then if she had the opportunity to do so. But even though that was how she was feeling, she managed to make it to the hotel standing firmly on her own two feet, steady. The fact that she'd pulled it off surprised her, remembering the amount of sheer pain she had to endure, convinced she wouldn't make it half way through the journey. But then again, she wouldn't have if it wasn't for Wendy. It still hurt of course, but not as much as it did before.

She took in a sharp breath, wiping away a tear after her laughter subsided.

Her chest burned and twisted after she'd laughed at Gray's futile jokes. As horrible as they were, she had to admit that they'd kept her distracted for the majority of the trip. But after a few laughs, she felt a sudden pang inside her lungs and gnawed at her cheeks to hold back the groans. Lucy had to keep them in. Mostly because she worried Natsu would notice. 

She felt his eyes trained on her a couple of times as they continued to walk down the path. And even if he did notice something amiss, he didn't dare speak. Regret, remorse, and worry visibly etched across his face in clear, bold letters.

“Will you be alright?” Wendy asked during the evening, peeking her head through the door frame as her blue tresses swayed behind her. “I can always sleep on the floor Lucy-san. That wouldn't bother me.”

Lucy waved her hand around with a small smile, waving away the offer. Wendy had helped her enough, she couldn't ask for more. “It’s alright, really. It doesn't hurt anymore. See?” She then started to tap on her chest and held back a wince in the process.

Of course that was a lie. Her collarbone painfully pulsated the more her fingers knocked against its surface while she simultaneously tried to refrain her teeth from chewing off the insides of her cheeks. But this wasn't anything particularly new for her. Lucy went through similar situations in the past where she'd badly injured herself, so in the end, she was able of throw a veil over it to safely conceal her discomfort.

Wendy smiled; the smile tinted the tiniest bit in worry. But she brought the lie. “I will be in the next room with Erza-san.” She pointed behind her back. "You can come see us if you need anything."

She then closed the door behind her, her footsteps fading into the background until it entirely disappeared. Believing that she had finally found some sort of alone time to reflect on some things, turned out she did not, and sensed the presence of another individual, easily perceiving the sounds of their feet shuffling behind the door. They paused every couple of seconds in front of hers before they resumed what they did, and walked back and forth once more.

Lucy remained sprawled across the bed, hugging the pillow that lay by her side and blinked at the door, curiosity showering over her. She waited for what felt like an eternity to give them the chance to express themselves, but the more time had passed, the more aggravated she grew. She lifted herself from the bed and swung the door open. To her surprise, it was Natsu. He froze mid-step.

“Natsu?” 

“Yeah?” He blinked back, clearly embarrassed he’d been caught like that. It was obvious when she saw the slight hue tinting his cheeks.

“What were you doing?” She asked and peeked her head out of the door to get a better look at the surroundings, thinking there must have been someone else with him. “Well, seems like you're by yourself,” she said before her brown eyes pierced his. “So what were you doing for fifteen minutes pacing around here?”

Natsu shuffled from side to side without an utterance of a word, which in the end, made her feel a bit strange. A weird sensation tingled underneath her warm, cotton clothes. He wasn’t being himself, she came to realise, after scrutinising the way he conducted himself in silence.

By now, he would have laughed off her words and barged inside her room uninvited, paying no mind to her warnings. But he hadn't done any of the following. If anything, he remained rooted in front of the door. His eyes were fixed on the floor, shifting from one pattern to the next as his eyes zoomed in on the tattered carpet, as if trying to solve a complicated puzzle.

_Ah, so it must've been that._

“What are you sulking about?” Lucy inquired and gripped the door, allowing her shoulders to slouch. Her expression softened. “You’re being a bit scary Natsu, you know?”

He flinched, his hands curling into fists. It took a little while for her to understand why, but once it made sense, Lucy realised how terrible her word selection was. She blanked, her face blanching.

“T-that’s not what I meant,” she clarified in a haste. “It's just — well,” she stopped for a moment. “You just...you're acting different."

He lifted his eyes from the ground, chewing on his lips, and although he'd tried to look her straight in the eyes, he couldn’t and struggled to do so. He looked behind her instead.

“Are you feeling better?” He asked. His voice was incredibly low. To be quite frank, she probably would’ve missed what he said if she wasn’t paying so much attention on his lips and observed the way they curved out the words. 

"Lucy?"

Lucy snapped back to reality and straightened her posture. Clearing her throat, she nodded her head. “Ah sorry... yeah, I am fine. Wendy helped.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Lucy responded and elevated her hand to press her fingers on her arm, but the second she'd tried to add pressure to it she found herself incapable of doing so. Natsu stepped forward and wrapped his fingers around her wrist, tearing it away from her arm.

“What are you doing?” Lucy raised one brow.

“You’re going to make it hurt if you do that,” Natsu mumbled in disapproval, his eyes narrowing down as he stared at her arm, examining it. His eyebrows were furrowed, his voice barely above a whisper and his fingertips gently tracing the disappearing burnt mark.

Lucy blinked, surprised, and then shrugged. “Well, at least you're inside now,” she said. “It was weird seeing out stand outside instead of coming in.”

“What?” Natsu blinked. The agony that was so dense and intense on his face disappeared.

“My room.”

“Ah.”

Lucy laughed and grabbed his forearm, pulling him further inside her room before he could react and closed the door behind them. No way in hell would he leave this room until he started to feel better. “You’re staying with me tonight.”

Natsu remained silent for a while, looking as gobsmacked as he did a while ago before his shoulders started to relax, some sort of relief washing over his face. His body was no longer rigid like a sculpture. “You’re weird,” he finally muttered with a faint smile.

Lucy leaned forward and smiled. "Why would you say that?”

“You normally whine when I stay in your room,” he said. 

Oh, so he was self-aware after all.

“I know,” she agreed and sat down on the bed. Her hand patted the vacant spot beside her to invite him over. His eyes flickered to the white sheets of the mattress, hesitation and panic flashing deep within his sombre irises. But even if they did, he chose to ignore it because he sat down next to her, his weight causing the spot he occupied to sink.

“So why?” He started.

Lucy pursed her lips in a thin line, failing to understand what he meant. “What?”

“Why aren’t you scared of me?” He asked again. “Gray told me everything.”

And then all too suddenly, the room hushed. Lucy could clearly hear the voices of Wendy, Gray and Erza booming over her door while they were discussing some stuff, but the second he’d asked her this question, her ears decided to cancel them out and zoomed in on Natsu’s instead.

“I am not,” Lucy gulped. Her fingers gripped the sheets. “Why would I be scared of you Natsu?”

His gaze bore a hole on his white trousers. “You know why.”

“Maybe,” she started. “Maybe I was a bit scared of your flames. But I trusted you. I always will. That’s why I…”

After she'd failed to complete her sentence even though she racked her brain for something,_ anything,_ he nodded his head and stood up. “Alright,” he mumbled and finally looked her in the eyes, a smile gracing his features. But having known him for such a long time, she could tell his smile wasn't genuine. It was one he'd forced upon himself to not make her worry. It was so unbelievably fake that she would poke fun at it if the situation wasn't so severe and the tension wasn't so thick.

“I think I want to sleep with Gray after all,” Natsu said and stepped away, the smile still there. She knew it would only last until he stepped out of her room...she was sure of it. “I will see you tomorrow.”

She nodded, a heavy feeling tugging at her chest.

“I will see you tomorrow. Sleep well.”

-x-

Dark.

Everything was so dark, obscure and odd. The floor rigid against her back and the cold air easily penetrating through her attire.

Rubbing the back of her head, she sat up in alarm once she realised she was in a place she hadn't seen before. Her head throbbed, followed up with a sudden rush of vertigo.

She blinked her eyes to adjust them to the darkness, and once her vision cleared up to a certain degree, she knew for sure she did not recollect a single memory of this supposed location. Lucy stood up and brushed off the dirt that covered her clothes before she navigated through the area to see if she could find some sort of clues. Or maybe find someone that could lend her a hand and help her out.

The place must've been a cave, she figured, judging by the rocks that encompassed the area and the darkness that entirely engulfed the vicinity as she tripped on several stones littering the floor. Luckily enough, however, there was a slight stream of light penetrating through the roof, and because Lucy could not see the surface it was hitting, she decided to follow the sparkling light. Relief washed over her as she did so. She assumed it must’ve been there for a purpose. One that could potentially lead her towards the exit. And once she was out, she could continue from there.

But above all that, she needed to find Natsu and Happy first. They couldn't be that far since they always went on missions together. But then she halted, staring at the spot the light blindly illuminated. Her heart sank at such a speed she thought she heard it drop in her bladder.

“Natsu?”

She didn’t get an answer, but even if she didn’t, she knew the person she was looking at was him. Without a doubt. She was positive of it. She couldn’t see his face since he faced the opposite direction, strapped on a solid wooden chair with ropes keeping him in place. He was oddly quiet as well, she noted, mute and limp against the furniture. Presumably unconscious by the looks of it. Her chest began to fill up with dread, her brain storming and knocking at her with far too many thoughts at once she felt incredibly dizzy; _Was he okay? Was he hurt?_

Taking a cautious step forward, she tapped a finger on his shoulder but didn’t receive a response, let alone a movement to clarify that he was still alive. Lucy tapped again with more force but still no reaction. Tired and anxious, she decided to grab his left shoulder and twisted it around to make him face her, but the second he did, her heart took a small break.

His eyes were pristine white, his mouth agape and his chest eerily still.

“Natsu?” Her grip tightened. “Wake up…” 

Her jaw clenched as she gripped his shoulders with such tightness she'd hoped he would wake up, whine, and ask her what the problem was. Or maybe tell her she'd gained strength while showing off his toothy smile, proud, the smile reaching his eyes like they always did.

But none of that happened. He wasn’t...he couldn’t actually be...? Could he?

He couldn’t be_ dead,_ right?

“You are late.”

She jumped at the voice. Despite the slight scare, she immediately recognised who it had belonged to. But his head was still limp against the head of the chair, his mouth not articulating the words he voiced strangely enough. His voice, however, sounded so different and lacked its customary warmth. It scared her.

“Natsu?” She repeated and pivoted around, searching for the location of the voice. “Where are you?”

“It’s too late,” he repeated himself, his voice drifting further away. “You were too late. Zeref won. You’re all by yourself now.”

“What are you talking about?” Lucy started. Panic kicked in. “If this is one of your pranks, I am telling you right now, it isn’t funny.”

“It’s not a joke. It can’t be. I am right there, _dead,_ right in front of you.” He stated and Lucy gulped, looking at the lifeless body against the chair. A knot formed inside her throat. “But because you abandoned me — because you stood back and did nothing to protect me, you’ll face the consequences for your lack of actions.”

Lucy shook her head. This was too weird after all. “I don’t believe it. You don’t sound like Natsu.” She muttered. "What kind of disgusting prank are you pulling?"

“None.” He clicked his tongue. “Look underneath you.”

She did as told. The second she saw that there no longer was a ground to support her she forgot how to breathe.

“You couldn’t do anything to help Lucy,” Natsu stated, his voice cold. _Please don’t hate me. _“I don’t want to see you anymore. Not after you stood back.” He continued. "And to think you loved me...I couldn't have been more wrong."

_Don’t hate me. Don’t hate me. Don’t hate me._

Lucy tried to explain herself, but the knot intensified so much inside her throat that she ended up choking instead of puking out any words. Whatever that held her up until this point decided to give her up right there and she fell — she fell so fast that she had to squeeze her eyes shut. She waited for the hit to pass, at this point ready to embrace the permanent sleep that awaited her. Maybe she could meet Natsu again. Maybe she could ask him to forgive her. Maybe she could ask him to not hate her. Maybe ask him to hate her less.

But before that could happen — before she even found the chance to embrace the darkness with welcoming hands, she jerked forward and blinked, panting so much one would think she had just ran a marathon. Lucy rubbed her eyes and analysed her surroundings. It seemed as though she was back inside the hotel room. She released a heavy sigh and placed a hand against her racing heart, trying to normalise her breathing pattern. But it was hard, and her eyes were starting to feel so warm — so _hot_. The tears burned her eye sockets. _She wanted them gone._

‘It was _just_ a nightmare. Calm down.’

“Lucy?”

Lucy jerked her head upwards, thinking she had been thrown into another soul wrenching nightmare but relaxed when she saw it was only Natsu, sitting at the edge of the bed. His fingers were tangled between her blonde strands as he moved them away from her soaking forehead. How did she fail to notice him when she woke up? Was she that shaken up? 

“Natsu?”

“Yes?” He moved his fingers away.

“You’re alive.” She breathed in relief. Not that she had wanted to say that. It kind of...slipped out before she even found the chance to process it.

He furrowed his brows in confusion. “Of course I am alive,” he replied with simplicity before he rapidly blinked. Realisation struck him then. “Did ya have a nightmare or something?” He asked, quiet.

“Yeah.” She nodded, lowering her head. “It was pretty bad, but I am glad you’re here.”

“Was I in it?” He added cautiously.

“Yeah,” her fingers gripped the blanket and she twisted it around her fingers, her breathing ragged. “I didn’t help you, so you—” she paused, gulping. The sound was so loud against her ears she was convinced he must have captured that as well. “You died...because I didn’t help you.”

He nodded his head. His face was so blank it gave little away, and his voice indicated no inflection when he spoke the following words. “Today must have been hard on you.” A long pause followed and a shuddering breath soon after. “I am sorry.”

Lucy blinked. His voice was surprisingly calm, lacking any sort of emotion but she knew — _knew_ and could easily see past his camouflage. He was annoyed and frustrated with himself, beads of sweat decorating his forehead as his hands curled into fists. He was blaming himself for her nightmare.

Without saying a word, she propelled herself forward and wrapped both of her arms around him so tightly she was convinced she could snap a bone. Natsu let out a strangled sound, not anticipating that at all, but he didn’t complain as he wrapped his own pair of arms around her. He buried his face in her hair, melting under the touch with uneven breaths rocking out of his lungs.

Contemplating whether to pull away or not after a minute of silence passed, Natsu tried to do that himself, which in the end made her decide against it. She held onto him, her fingers fisting the material of his waistcoat. “What’s the matter, Natsu?”

“You’re not actually okay. Are you, Lucy?” He whispered back, the waft of his warm breath tickling her neck. She tried her best not to shiver, ignoring the butterflies inside her stomach. Now wasn’t the time.

“I am,” she took in a deep breath before she continued. “I am fine. I really am.” She reassured him, burying her face deeper in the crook of his neck. “It’s just…the thought of losing you sometimes scares me. It's—” a pause. “What happened back when you fought Zeref still hasn’t left me.”

She felt his muscles tense.

“Can I pull away Lucy?”

“No.”

“But I wanna look at you when I talk.”

“No, it’s fine. We can always do it like this.” She responded. “What did you want to say?”

“I…”

Another long pause followed.

“Take your time.”

“You know…” Another break, and he breathed in slowly. “You know Lucy...the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you.” Natsu voiced his thought, his voice swaying left and right. “The burns that were on your arms...I didn’t mean to...”

“Yeah?” One of her hands left his back and travelled up his spine, the tip of her fingertips brushing alongside his bare neck before they finally threaded through his dishevelled hair. She brushed through them gently, letting him know that she was there. That he could take his time — that she would sit here even if it took him all the time in the world to do so.

“I don’t want to hurt anyone, Lucy. Never.” Natsu continued, his voice cracking a little bit when he said her name. He wanted to embrace her more, invite her closer to his warmth, that much she could sense when his breathing swayed, but he stopped himself, keeping a distance despite already being in her arms. “I know I said I wanted all of you to fight alongside me, but I also know that I forgot the harm I caused. What if that happens again? What if it gets more serious?” He added. “Lucy, the fact that I hurt you and forgot about it…_hurts_.”

Lucy sighed and rubbed the back of his head as he shook. To think that he would be so transparent about his feelings when he never was…hit her harder than she thought it would.

“I was the one who stepped forward to stop you,” Lucy responded, struggling to find the correct words to use. “I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt me.” 

“But still Lucy,” he tried. But the more he spoke and tried to express himself, the more he struggled to expel the words out of his lips. “It was _me_."

"It was an accident, you didn't mean it." Lucy said. "And it doesn't hurt. Not anymore. Not after Wendy took care of it. You don't need to hold yourself back, you know?" She laughed and hugged him tight, closing the remaining distance between them. "See? My chest doesn't hurt anymore."

“But…”

“Look Natsu,” Lucy started. “You said you hated to see me hurt, right?”

She felt him nod, and when he didn’t say anything she continued.

“And you trust me, don’t you?”

Again, another voiceless nod.

“Then I am fine.” Lucy said, voice determined. “I am more than fine right now.”

He waited for a while, probably organising his never ending thoughts and regrets before he buried his face deeper in her hair, letting himself relax finally.

"Stop beating yourself up for it, alright?" Lucy whispered. “We will figure something out later.”

He nodded and finally pulled her back.

He examined her face and tenderly brushed his pinky across her right cheek. She bit back a laugh under batted lashes and grabbed the collar of his waistcoat to pull him downwards. She brushed her lips against his. At least that would help him get rid of the devastated expression that was still prominent on his countenance. Well she'd hoped.

His eyes widened, blinking. "That was…"

"Yeah?" Lucy dragged and leaned forward, eagerly waiting for his answer. "How was it?"

"Dunno," he traced his own lips with his fingers, wonder and curiosity twinkling in his eyes as he stared at them. Lucy’s lips curled into a genuine smile. The sadness that garnished his face was no longer present.

Good.

"Do it again."

Well, that was unexpected.

"Mm?" She hummed, amused. "What was that, Natsu?"

He didn't dare repeat himself. Instead, he captured her chin between his index finger and thumb and titled it upwards to get better access of it. Lowering his head, his eyelids fluttered to a closure as he allowed his lips to get a better taste of hers this time around. He dared capture and tug at her bottom lip between his teeth before he let it go and she squealed, obviously not expecting such boldness to come from him.

But she smiled anyways and ran a finger across his lips after they had pulled apart. "They're dry. You haven't been drinking, have you?"

He pursed his lips and pouted. "Kinda forgot." He rubbed the back of his head and sheepishly looked away.

"Well, I guess I will have to be more careful in the future so something like this doesn't happen anymore."

Natsu smiled. It wasn't just any smile though. It was the kind of smile she had always seen on him. It was the kind of smile that was so contagious it could make anyone's day.

"You don’t have to worry about that." Natsu mumbled and looked back at her, his blinding smile appearing once more. "It won’t happen again. I will protect you.”

"Ah, that reminds me," Lucy started. "When did you enter my room?"

Natsu rubbed his chin, spilling a grin of embarrassment. "When I left my room to get a drink I heard sounds coming from yours. So I thought I would check on you." He said, eyebrows furrowing in worry. "Good thing I did though."

"Don't tell me you were actually still pacing around the corrid—"

He shut her up by pressing a peck on her lips.

"No. I wasn't."

She pouted. "You're hopeless."

**Author's Note:**

> Hey last fairy tail episode soon:<
> 
> Anyways hope you guys enjoyed this!


End file.
